There are lots of things I have been trying to ignore for a while, trying not to see, trying not to hear, but I can’t stop thinking. Maybe I am thinking a bit too much, but I just can’t take my mind of you. There are things I know I have to do, and I know if I want to do it, I can make it happened… But the point is… do I want to make it happened? Do I want to do it? Recently, I realize one thing. People said memories will fade away in times, but smell, smell will never fade away. You will never forget the smell. But you know what? Recently I feel like I am forgetting your smell. In the past I could pick up your little smell among people; similar smell, a bit here and there. But now, I can’t pick up your smell.. there are so many people in this god damn small city, and I can’t pick up a similar smell of yours… not among all these people… is that possible? Or am I just forgetting your smell? I am scared… that’s the last thing I remember of you… the last thing of you that will never fade away… but your smell is fading, and I don’t want it to go… I don’t want you to go. I need something to hold on to, I need something to keep up my faith. What am I when I lost you? I can’t find myself… I know I have to do it on my own, I know I have to get away from you… someday, one day, eventually… but I don’t think I am ready yet… I don’t know… I am not ready to lose you, but I have already lost you. no, i am not okay. | 
Lifetime
